d a r k s i d e

w e l c o m e t o t h e m a c h i n e


The blog has been devoid of substance for some time now. This is not when that changes.
Date started: Feb 23 04
Time started: 4:56

Name: XAQ (Zachary Dean Rothman)
Age: 15 years, 6 months, 4 days, 9 hours, 32 minutes
Birthday: August 19, 1988
Zodiac: Leo
Weight: ~140
Color of eyes: green right now
Hair: brown
Height: 5' 9-11"
Shoe size: 10 or so, there's no fucking standardization in this country
Glasses, contacts: zircon encrusted tweezers
Parents: a couple
Siblings: Sarah the un-slut, Big Mikey, and Emma-nem (who "came-out", so to speak, BEFORE the rapper)
Right / Left handed: right
Current place of residence: TKPK REPRESENT, YO
Previous residences: 607 Ray Drive (literally right across the street form TKPK)
Relationship status: NO VACANCY :)
Been in Love: ahhh, difficult question, this is like the SAT, the wrong answer loses points, the right answer gains points, and leaving it blank sets you where you started. you understand...
Who do you live with: mi familia
House, apartment, basement suite, other: house
When is your bedtime: whenever i'm tired / my conciense says "GO TO SLEEP OR YOU'LL BE LATE TO SCHOOL"
Do you like to drive fast: near-life experience
First car: not for a while
Best physical feature: hmmm...thatwould still be my righteous bassist arms
Fears: choking to death
Allergies: whatever metal that necklace Nessa has is made out of

Do You:
Swear: fuck yeah
Sing: not quite as well as I would like (maynard), but pretty good, i think.
Want kids: later, ok?
Get along with your parents: most of the time
Like thunderstorms: warm ones
Play an instrument: what a pointless question..........BASS
Get motion sickness: nope
Believe in yourself: yah
Want to get married: possibly
Know who that lucky someone is: no
Think you are a health freak: hahahahahNO
Want to go to college/university: i think so...of course
Like(d) high school: eh, the people make it worth it.
Believe in your friends: most of them
Believe in Santa Claus/Tooth Fairy: I DO believe in faeries, I DO, I DO
Believe in Destiny/Fate: nope
Believe in Angels/Ghosts/UFO's: I'm sure there's more life in the infinite universe.
Sleep with a stuffed animal: no
Eat broccoli/ Brussels sprouts: occasionally/no
How many rings before you answer the phone? as few as possible
Favor the snooze button: at least twice
Have a cell phone: if only

Color(s): blue like your soul
Movie(s): many many, I suppose FIGHT CLUB ans THE MATRIX are at the top
Subject(s): does Jazz Band count?
Shampoo: uhhh, whatever gets my hair clean
Cartoon Character(s): Trent Lane
Ice Cream: vanilla with chocolate chips all mixed up
Alcoholic Drink: no thanks
Sport to watch: no watching
Month: late spring/summer
Day of the week: friday/saturday
Day of the year: hmmm, the last day of school, whenever that is
Board Game: RISK
Smells: girls' hair (Lizzi :) ), mmmCookies
T.V. show(s): tv is a big barren place
Books: His Dark Materials, THGTTG, AND MANY MORE
Fast Food place: chipotle
Place to be: i don't know...WEEKEND OF DOOM, ctf, the gazebo in old town, the hill in the creek, wherever lizzi is...
Place to relax: see above (minus ctf, i suppose)
Pie: apple
Magazine: Bass Guitar
Sound: myself playing bass, breaking glass, lizzi's voice (is this getting to be too much? maybe i'll stop? nah...)
Band: TOOL
Article of clothing: various t-shirts i have
Kitchen Appliance: BLENDER
Childrens book: ummm...not the Lorax
Flowers: splowers
Childhood Memory: nebulous
Underwear: boxers? what do you want here?
Cologne/Perfume: AXE...NOT. i prefer my own special smell.
Household chore: SWIFFER
Animal: snake
Number: 42

Right Now:
Wearing: gray boxers, black holy jeans w/ duct tape, Lake Wobegon t-shirt (a favorite) big band-aid on foot to keep entrails in
Hair Style: back
Feeling: mmmLuuuuuv...
Drinking: nothang
Eating: see above
Listening to: shit, nothing...ok, now Alice In Chains
Talking to: Bruno y Jeff
Watching: the computer screen?
Reading book: 1984
Under your bed: large pillow
Whats in the trunk of your car: i dunno
People I can trust: you know who you are
CD's I own: I could give the list, but I shan't, I'll just say somwhere between 50 and 60
Piercing/Tattoos: none...yet
Times name has been in the newspaper: twice, both in the Voice, once with Louis being interviewed about taxes (?) and again with Sebi interviewed about the folk festival...classic.
Scars on my body: several, the newest being on my left foot.
Things I regret: too much. though i guess regretting one thing is too much. that's why it's regret.
Close friends i have: again, you know who you are
New friends i have met in the past year: LOTS of people, Leslie, Katie, Lizzi, Kate, Emily, Jossie, Colin, Gannett, Adam, more that i regretfully forgot but that will rectify this memory lapse by leaving comments...MARISSA, CRYSTAL, CTF PEOPLE

Summer/Winter: summer, I am SO SICK of winter
Chocolate/vanilla: vanilla WITH chocolate
Hugs/Kisses: depends on who's offering
Relationships/one night stands: relationships, of course
McDonalds/Burger King: McDonalds if I must
Adidas/Nike: Abbie Hoffman
Lipton Iced Tea/Nestea: snapple
Cappuccino/coffee: CHAI
Scary Movies/happy endings: either
Toilet paper over/under: under
Morning/Night: all in one go!
Eggs: scrambled
Showers/baths: yes, please
Coffee/tea: TEA
Strong mind/strong body: hard decision

The last (time)/ever:
Movie watched in the theatre, and with who: 50 first dates with Lizzi and other incidental people...just kinnindg, Alex, Jacki, Claire, Katie, Crystal, Bruno, Josh, StephenP
Person you talked to on the phone: Lizzi
Person you fought with: Katie
Thing you ate: atomic fireball
Person you asked out: duhLizzi
You cried: i guess about 2 months ago that time when I was slightly sick and overwhelmed with homework
You wore a skirt: probably sometime in 8th grade
You met someone new: 2 weeks ago, Crystal
Cleaned your room: Saturday
Done Laundry: Saturday
Drove a car: uhhhhh...never
Baked a cake: loooong time ago
You Drank Alcohol: last passover i guess, not much
Got trashed/extremely intoxicated: never
Been called a tease: i dunno, never in earnest
Gotten Beat up: UNDEFEATED/unchallenged
Changed who you were to fit in: god i hope never, you never know, though
Gone on a date: heehee, yesterday
Gone to the mall: wheaton...a while ago
Eaten an entire box of something in one sitting: mmmmmcheezits
Been on stage: does SSTTR count?
Been dumped: UGH, July 4th 2003
Gone skating: January 10th, 2004
Dyed your hair: last year, BLOO
Been hurt emotionally: anyone who hasn't isn't actually human
Kept a secret from everyone: yah
Wanted to hook up with a friend: not since february 4th :)
Had a crush on a teacher: ew, no
Cut your hair: not for more than 2 years...soon though
Been sarcastic: NAWWWW
Thought an animated character was hot: all those disney heroines are
Had a new kids on the block tape: What?

Who did you meet first of your friends: probably Carter, though neither of us remember it
Who's the loudest: BRUNO
Who's the shyest: Jeff at times
Who's the hottest: definitely me
Who do you go to for advice: Jeff, Alex, Louis, Bruno?, Anuja
Who do you cry to: me onsies

About the Opposite Sex:
Favorite eye color: blooooo again
Favorite hair color/style: By my heel, I care not.
Favorite article of clothing: see above
Best physical feature: smile
First thing you notice about them: gender
Turn offs: stupidity, sluttiness
Turn ons: humor, funness, sincerity
Do you have a crush: heehee, yeah....
Are you too shy to ask someone out: not that it matters right now but no

How many kids do you want: LESS THAN 4
Age to get married: waiting is
Age to have kids: see above
Your most missed memory: AHHHHHHHHHH i don't have any, that's depressing, there are certainly memories i WISH i could miss...
Goal/ Resolution: learn to read music, ROCK ON, SPIRAL OUT
What do you want to be when you grow up: inspirational
What country would you most like to visit: i dunno, england (liverpool... :) )
Best feeling in the world: mastering/writing and awesome song
Worst feeling in the world: dread/paralyzing regret
If you could have any job what would it be: BASS
Most important thing in life: all you need is love.../free expression
Where do you see your self in 5 years: college

If You Could:
Build a house anywhere, where would you: i don't know, but it would be designed by Howard Roark
Have a super power what would it be: FLIGHT
See a person from the past who would it be: John Lennon
Won the lottery what would you do if you have two days: get my uber-bass, invest

Date ended: Feb. 23, 2004
Time ended: 10:31 (with a LOT of breaks/distractions)
posted by Xaq Rothman at 22:31     
yeah, i guess i am... posted by Xaq Rothman at 11:36     
Happy half-birthday XAQ (ME!) and Dan Curl!

More: Recently I have encountered a new and confusing emotional occurrance: sometimes I feel guilty for being so happy and satisfied with life when so many of my friends are so chronically unhappy/stressed out. I talk to CAP people and pretty much all of them are like AAAAAAAAHHHHH FEATURE ARTICLE/NSL/DEATH and I've finished literally ALL of my homework an hour ago. See some of them are reading this now and going DAMN YOU ZACK. Oh, well.
posted by Xaq Rothman at 17:34     

You Should Wear
Your Girlfriend's Panties!

She won't know what to think about this, but it will be worth it. Tip: if you can't keep the goods tucked away, try chilling them with ice first.

Find out which No Pants Day outfit YOU should wear!

No Pants Day is May 7th, 2004. To find out more about No Pants Day, visit


I don't really know what to say...thanks, but no thanks?

posted by Xaq Rothman at 23:57     

Shows @ the 9:30 club!
Saturday, March 13th: P-FUNK! - $35
Tuesday, March 16th: Three Days Grace - $9.91 -- Eh, Jeff?
Tuesday, April 6th: THE DARKNESS - PRICELESS

Free time in Programming affords interesting opportunities.

PS: WHOA UPDATE: @ the Black Cat:
Saturday, April 24th: LOCAL H - $12 -- EEE!!!

posted by Xaq Rothman at 08:00     

Funny how a COMPLETE LACK OF ANGST makes this blog suck. Eh, who cares?
posted by Xaq Rothman at 00:49     
there are no words

PS: I am SO TIRED. And I'll tell you why. Later.
PPS: Actually, I will tell me why. But you can read it if you want.
posted by Xaq Rothman at 17:05     
For the first time in a while, I can say this: Happy Valentines Day! 'Nuff said.

posted by Xaq Rothman at 23:58     
who = cares?
sleep = good, but lacking
math = x(boring)sleep
chemistry = pfft
guitar = twang
lunch = mmm, 4 tasty days
english = HATE
aikido = twisty
persuasive speaking = ARGH
blog = sense of obligation?
sleep = NOW
posted by Xaq Rothman at 23:18     
hahah, Michael Moore and...that other dude posted by Xaq Rothman at 22:48     

Way to share in my revelation, guys. Oh, well. Tomorrow it will be THURSDAY. And I will have my FIRST REAL BASS LESSON. And it will rock. And the same guy teaches Jeff guitar, so we could have like, joint lessons. And then we could each have two lessons per week. Muahahah, devious...

Just thought you might be interested.
posted by Xaq Rothman at 22:26     
I'm sure you want to hear more about THIS band...
I think Parabol/Parabola [tracks 6/7 for those unfamiliar with Lateralus, for example, people who just got it recently ;)] is a love song. Like most Tool songs, there's a major theme of self discovery, however, the lyrics have a lot of "we"s and "you"s in them. I suppose he could be talking to himself, but if he's talking to another person, then WHOA. It's easy to see that love and sex are written ALL OVER it. But in a good way. Check it out.

Sorry if I'm ruining anyone's perceptions, I hate it when that happens.

PS: This theory has NOTHING to do with the video, that's another thing ALTOGETHER. Madness.

PPS: ├ćnima is like clear water, like a waterfall, and Lateralus is like blood. But not like violence. Like life and passion. Does anyone else see this?

PPPS: No, I have no life.
posted by Xaq Rothman at 16:14     
Sometimes I feel like I don't belong anywhere. It seems sometimes like everyone I know has a core of people or a certain place, where they go, and they feel safe and at home. Alex has Sheridan, Lizzi has Lumina, and even without institutions, there are groups of people that just seem so...together, not in the organized way, but like, close. I don't feel like that with anyone. Like Alex has this list now on his Xanga of things he misses, and it makes me think: what's worse, missing things, or not even having things to miss? There are people and places and groups that I value, so many I can't even list them all or fear of forgetting some, but none of them feel so close. And BANDS. You hear bands talking about how they're this great big family and their bandmates are their best friends. I have lots of fun playing music and hanging out with the bands I play with, none of them feel like family. But I bet everyone feels like this. Just one of those usual teenage angst things...I guess this post is just a sign of me going through the eternal human quest to feel a sense of belonging.

Try to keep it all in perspective, right?
posted by Xaq Rothman at 23:58     

"he's quite a clean old man, isn't he?"
  • Ice Cream For Breakfast Day = Mark's Kitchen with Lizzi + Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Ice Cream
  • Hard Day's Night is a strange movie
  • a thought: An upside to your mom always being late to pick you up from places is that you often are the last to leave a party or gathering, so you know you're not missing anything. Unless it's one of those, guys leave, girls sleepover things. The only way to deal with one of those is to have the guys sleepover somewhere else. Yes.
  • I went to Borders today with Lizzi, and she got Lateralus at my suggestion. There's hope for her yet... :)
  • I don't like having DJs at parties. Maybe because I don't really like dancing. That's the only time I really feel self-conscious. But also becasue the DJ just assumes what stuff you want to hear, and not all of it is that great. I think it would be just as easy and probably less expensive to just like, rent a nice big stereo thing and put on your own music. That way, you can have whatever you want. Easy.
Good night.
posted by Xaq Rothman at 00:37     
From toolshed.down.net:
Work is underway on Tool's next album, despite the fact that A Perfect Circle will be touring for the next little while. The writing process for this album will be similar to the process for "Lateralus": the band works on music, sends demos to Maynard, he works on vocals, and so on. The singer discusses this in the newest issue of Kerrang magazine, saying "we're working on a new Tool record now. I'm multi-tasking. I can't walk and chew gum but I can change hats." It was four and a half years between "├ćnima" and "Lateralus", it has so far been (only) almost three since the spirally record was released. So really, they are almost ahead of schedule.
posted by Xaq Rothman at 22:49     
bass and amp: $275
Rage Against the Machine self-titled album: $15
rocking out along with your favorite RAtM song: PRICELESS
posted by Xaq Rothman at 23:06     

life is gooooooood!
Following Emily's lead, I present to you a fast-forward version of my life since exams ended:
Thursday Jeff comes over, I tell my mom in the car about me failing the English exam, she arranges for me to take it on Friday, Jeff and I play music for a few hours, Jeff goes home, I study, I go to Louis's, we (Jeff, Louis and I) watch crazy Don Hertzfeldt cartoons, we go to 6-12 and get Pringles, Mountain Dew, Dr Pepper, Root Beer, cookies and about a pound and a half of chocolate, we go back to Louis's and stay up until 4:30 Friday morning watching the Wall, Rage Live at the Olympic Auditorium, the Wizard of Oz with the Dark Side of the Moon cued up (it worked!), drawing comics, two hours later Louis's mom wakes me up, I got to Blair for a couple hours and finish the English essay, I go back to Louis's and we watch The Royal Tenenbaums, and have a epic gun battle, and I go to a practice with Eris (Holiday?), but no Gannett, so no work, Saturday morning Aikido for the first time in a month and a half, Shinai sparring awesomeness, then Bokken seminar at 3, can't remember what I did that evening, Sunday go to WES for MLK Jr. Day, feel dead, teen group, learn of Anti-Flag concert (!!!), Monday = snow, hang out with Bruno, Issac, Louis, sledding at TPMS, lunch at Golden Star, Tuesday...Blank, Wednesday = snow = no school, other than that, BLANK, Thursday, finally back in school, take BASS to get fixed at Atomic Music, Aikido, ANTI-FLAG CONCERT = Xaq's first concert (unless the chili-cook off counts [it doesn't]), moshing 3/5 of the time, crowd surfed once, total awesome life changing experience, Friday first Odd Day of the semester, Jazz Band, after school watch Fight Club with Lizzi :) Bruno comes over, we stay up til 2 talking to...Lizzi :) Saturday, Aikido, SSTTR with Lizzi :) (I think you get the point, I'll stop doing that now) new members Jeff, Colin, Alex Spork, we go to Starbucks, mom picks Jeff and me up, we take 2 hours to get to Atomic Music to pick up fixed bass which WORKS, Sunday, babysitting at WES for $10, best Obelisk practice ever, Monday school, little else exciting, Tuesday = ...rain? = no school, Panera with Lizzi, Big Fish with lots o' people (weird movie, but good), Chuck's with Jeff and Bruno, yesterday, school again, after alskjh435820-46tue kljy4twatoi4qw]t6yu LIZZI :) YAY!
So that wasn't so fast. Oh, well, it's not for you anyway, it's for me.
posted by Xaq Rothman at 08:55     
9:30 CLUB
posted by Xaq Rothman at 21:53     

Soon after, the confusion from the alien's past left him, and he finally had the confidence to confess his feelings to the princess's sister. So he did. The princess's sister graciously forgave him for the time he kept her waiting, and it finally WAS. There was great rejoicing and all of the flowers and birds congratulated them, and they thanked the garden creatures for their endless help. Thus the limbo was ended, and a new era of happiness in the kingdom was begun.

(or is it the beginning?)
posted by Xaq Rothman at 18:28     
Someday this will come back. Until then, deal with it. Isn't it sad how I feel the need to make little posts like this? Wouldn't it be better if I just posted nothing until I wanted to put something up with some substance.
posted by Xaq Rothman at 22:48     


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